|Polish Flag by Dorota Quiroz|
Leaving one place for another is a double edge sword. Sharp, dangerous and possibly lethal.
The upcoming venture might be something you have waited for a long time or it could be a last minute arrangement. You can be depressed and happy at the same time, terrified and courageous, bored and excited - you pick your list of antonyms.
It was a major trip bound to be dangerous and adventurous and I was … crushed.
The knowledge of upcoming life-changing departure put me in a twilight zone. It dawned on me that everything I knew would be turned up side down and things would never be the same. The time was merciless.
Gloom took over first. When attending traditional senior ball ("Studniowka"), which usually takes place about 100 days before the final written exit exams ("Matura") in high school, I was tearing up all evening long. I was at the party, but there was nothing to celebrate.
|Senior year class picture IV LO in Gdynia |
(I'm in the middle row, 3rd from left)
The fear of unknown appeared gently and lingered till the departure day. This was my Poland, my home, familiar and friendly, despite of crumbled condition, poverty and tyranny. We had our family and friends here, language and culture, faith and traditions, education and jobs. We were leaving all that behind, for something new, unforeseen and foreign. We were going to be among strangers, in a foreign culture, without language except my broken English, without education or possibility to work despite of advanced medical training and experience of my mother. Why in the world would anyone take such risk?
|Reunion with my classmates after 25 years!|